Guinness World Records has named Donald J. Trump the greatest con man of all-time.
Competing against such heavyweights as Frank William Abagnale Jr., Bernie Madoff and Charles Ponzi, Trump was delighted to learn of this latest honor. “That’s some helluva group I was up against, let me tell you. I just want to thank all those, beautiful, beautiful, gullible people out there.”
Said a spokesperson for Guinness, “Our research showed no other con artist has ever been able to maintain his deception for as long as Mr. Trump. Most others have either been imprisoned or otherwise forced to end their ways.”
It’s well-known Trump takes great pride in being the best at whatever he attempts. Here is a man who will cheat, lie and throw his own mother under the bus to get his way. He is obsessed with winning. “If you’re not the best,’ observed Trump, “then you’re a loser.”
Trump can now add his new title of “greatest con man” to that of: best president, greatest businessman, smartest human being, finest golfer, biggest jobs creator, and top biblical scholar.
“What other guy on that list (referring to Guinness) could con his way into the Oval Office to become the most powerful man in the world?” Trump asked. “I deserve this. I’m the greatest huckster, hands down.”
Mocking the “Fake News Media,” Trump added, “When I said I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shot someone and not loose any support, they all laughed at me. They’re not laughing now. Let’s face it, I am the greatest salesman of all time!”
Very few people would argue with that assessment.
Photo | cnn.com, alex brandon/AP
